pick-up lines

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The big list of pick-up lines for groan-ups

April 15th 2009 12:40

Normally the heart beats 35 million times a year. Mine would reach that in one evening with you.

How was heaven when you left?

Can you please tell your body to stop staring at me.

Hi, I just wanted to give you the satisfaction of turning me down. Go ahead say no.

"You look like my first wife." "Really? How many times have you been married?" "Oh I'm still a bachelor."

I'd like to say that I am not interested in sex without mutual consent. I'd also like to say that you have my consent.

I miss my teddy bear. Would you sleep with me?

If I said you had a beautiful body, would you hold it against me?

Do you have a map? I keep getting lost in your eyes.

If you've lost your virginity, can I have the box it came in?

Do you sleep on your stomach? If not, can I?

I know milk does a body good, but damn, how much have you been drinking?

I like maths. Would you want to go to my room, add the bed, subtract your clothes, divide your legs and multiply?

I'm new in town. Could I have directions to your apartment.

If you were a pair of pants I'd wear you out.

I've just received government funding for a four-hour expedition to find your G-spot.

Do you believe in love at first sight, or do I have to walk by again?

Can I check your shirt label? I want to see if you were made in heaven.

If you are what you eat, I could be you by morning.

When they made the alphabet they should have put U and I together.

I would crawl naked in the cold rain over broken glass just to hear you speak over the telephone.

I think you're the light at the end of my tunnel.

Excuse me, but I couldn't help noticing how much you have been noticing me noticing you.

Wouldn't we look cute on a wedding cake together?

If I follow you home, will you keep me?

If you're going to regret this in the morning, we can sleep until the afternoon.

If you stood in front of a mirror and held up 11 roses, you would see 12 of the most beautiful things in the world.

When God made you, he was showing off.

Screw me if I'm wrong, but you want to kiss me don't you?

Do you know the essential difference between sex and conversation? No? Do you want to come upstairs and talk?

See my friend over there? He wants to know if you think I'm cute.

The only thing your eyes haven't told me is your name.

There must be something wrong with my eyes, I can't take them off you.

I must be lost. I thought paradise was further south.

I lost my phone number. Can I borrow yours?

Are you accepting applications for your fan club?

All the seats appear taken. Can I sit on your lap?

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Posted By: Chris Champion - Category: Relationships

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12 Comments. [ Add A Comment ]

Comment by SpikeTheLobster

April 15th 2009 13:00

Wordophilia
Qwerk
Peanut Butter

Hah! I like "When God made you, he was showing off." I shall have to use that on my lady and see how long she laughs.

And the dirty side of my mind is amused by "If you've lost your virginity, can I have the box it came in?" - bwahahaha!

Comment by Janet Collins

April 15th 2009 13:49

Acceptable Etiquette
The Social Critic
Janet Collins Blog

What happened to..."Can I buy you a drink?"

Ugg! I must be showing my age

Comment by Chris Champion

April 15th 2009 20:08

LettersToNorm
moneywhither
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Newly Old

Hi Spike, I like "showing off" too. It almost makes it out of corny into clever.

Hi Janet, I agree completely. My wife's reaction when I read her some of these: "I don't like any of them." I said, "Would you prefer someone just saying, "Would you mind if I said hello?" and she said, "Yes!" Good thing we were introduced by mutual friends - I might have blown if I'd met her in a singles bar

Comment by Morgan Bell

April 15th 2009 21:45

Science News
Deep Pencil
Business News
Movie Train
Artist Quirk

i like those guys than will go up to women that are in a group and say "hello lay-deez" hahaha

so goofy

Comment by Chris Champion

April 15th 2009 21:48

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Hi Morgan,

Do you like goofy goofy, or the sort of goofy that takes practice and a bit of acting talent?

Comment by Morgan Bell

April 15th 2009 22:57

Science News
Deep Pencil
Business News
Movie Train
Artist Quirk

goofy goofy . . . those men that have no idea theyre doing it all wrong, someone that looks genuinely shocked when one of the "lay-deez" laughs at him

Comment by Chris Champion

April 15th 2009 23:00

LettersToNorm
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Yeah, I like goofy goofy too. They're genuine people.

Comment by Mr Nice Guy

April 16th 2009 03:45

Pop Culturist
Pop Rock Factory

So that explains it . . . and I thought I was both funny and smooth - do'h

Comment by Chris Champion

April 16th 2009 04:19

LettersToNorm
moneywhither
Vyoos
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It's all in the delivery MNG. From you, any one of those lines would have 'em swooning

Comment by Cheryl J

April 16th 2009 06:40

Rhythmatism
Zentertainment
Budget Centsability

Oh good grief, these are all awful! There is more corn here than a field of maize.

I'm with Janet. Just say hello and offer a drink or even just introduce yourself

Comment by Chris Champion

April 16th 2009 06:52

LettersToNorm
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Hi Cheryl,

They are definitely, truly awful. So bad they're funny.

Comment by treay

June 3rd 2009 22:55

Pick up lines can work great, but they can never be delivered in a serious manner, they must only be used as a joke for an ice breaker.

I have always found, if you can begin a relationship with a laugh, it will go alot better than trying out a pick up line in a sleazy manner!... Just doesn't work.

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